Because, for a few years now, I've been deeply connected with a sense of purpose to help bring back the sacredness, joy, wonder and connectedness of motherhood.
I know that being a mother can sometimes feel like hell - when we're disconnected from ourselves, from our needs, our passions and desires; when our own big feelings come up and get in the way of our love for our kids; when we're feeling guilty about what we haven't done to help our children; or shame about the things we've done in those moments of overwhelm, frustration and powerlessness.
I know too, that we CAN reconnect with the heaven of being a mother, AND that we need a fiercely compassionate willingness to look within ~ to look at our cultural conditioning, our core beliefs, at the way we don't honour and value ourselves, at the way we don't listen to ourselves, and where we cut ourselves off from the support and sisterhood that we all need.
We need to keep making new choices, so that we can put in place our own meaning and values, so we can honour ourselves, value ourselves, listen to ourselves, and receive the loving support and community that makes all the difference.
To have this, and do this, we need a consistent willingness.
And our motivation can come from the knowledge that our relationship with ourselves fundamentally affects our children.
Our children learn their core beliefs about life, about humanity, and about themselves, from us.
And I know that, at times, choosing heavenly mothering over hellish mothering can seem like the hardest thing in the world, especially when our children help us connect with our deepest losses, griefs and frustrations.
I want to make a different to mothers, and I'd love to help you make a difference in your life.
I know that you can have an even more beautiful life, and I'd love to be a part of your journey to shining even more than you do now.
Have you been trudging through life, feeling guilty, getting fed up, feeling flat and overwhelmed by all the things that need to be done?
Are you wanting to reclaim your birthright - to know your power as a mother?
Do you want to allow motherhood to be deeply meaningful, connected, joyful, and fulfilling?
Do you know in your heart that you can't really give your child/ren all they need without giving yourself all that you need?
Are you wanting to help them to grow up being compassionate and fully loving beings? (You know that that means being compassionate and loving to yourself?)
Our children don't get what we try to tell them about life; they get what we really believe about ourselves and our lives.
Valuing yourself, your purpose, meaning, needs, desires, feelings and passions communicates to them by osmosis to do the same for themselves.
Have you read a gazillion parenting books?
Now is the time for YOU - not at the expense of your children, but in a way that deeply ENHANCES their lives.
It's time for you to finally be free from that guilt that has been shackling you for all of this time.
Now is the time to banish punishing yourself.
You know all the theory that says that we pass on our conditioning to our children, and that how we treat ourselves is how our children learn to treat themselves.
And yet at times it can be so hard to transform those old ways of not listening to yourself, of putting yourself last, of getting into drudgery and dullness and forgetting what a wonder and honour it is to be a mother.
Having fun and joy, both with our children and at other times too, is one of the most healing and spiritually advanced practices we can do.
What are you going to do when serious mode takes over?
Are you going to wait for your life to start when your kids leave home?
Or are you going to let yourself have an amazing, wonderful, meaningful, fulfilling, transforming life as a mother?
Are you going to accept those old beliefs that have been passed down generation after generation that tell us we need to be punished and shamed in order to be loving members of society?
Are you going to accept those beliefs that tell us that women need to sacrifice their needs, their desires, their joys and their purpose in order to be a mother - or to sacrifice their relationship to their children in order to do what they love?
Or are you going to sink into the joy of knowing, not just in your head, but deep in your heart, that truly giving to yourself and letting yourself receive, have fun, value yourself, live your passion, give your gifts and have a richly fulfilling life ALSO gives your child the most amazing gifts in their life?
The time of doing it all alone is over.
Are you willing to actually LIVE the knowing that we probably had 3,000 years ago -
That mothers are divine.
Not just think it, or read it in a book or on a website, or do a workshop, but actually LIVE that life, NOW?
I want that for you.
I've had it with us mothers settling for cake crumbs, the last on the list, fading out and losing our passion and vitality.
I stand for mothers living passionate, juicy, fulfilled, vibrant, connected lives, giving deeply to our children because we are connected deeply to Life.
I want that for you.
Changing can be scary.
But staying the in the same well-worn path, even though it is known and familiar, can really scare the life out of us.
We all want familiarity and safety.
But in each of us there is a driving, persistent, amazing impulse to keep growing and changing.
Just like that little yellow flower which finds a way to grow through a crack in concrete, our life impulse will find any way to grow.
But wouldn't you prefer to prepare the ground for your growth?
To grow in a beautiful garden or field or mountain or valley, rather than squeezing your way through a crevice?
I know that feeling guilty, putting yourself last, not valuing your needs, not having fun, not doing what you love, all kept you safe in some way.
Perhaps, like many women, you promised your mother that you would be like her.
Perhaps you got shamed or sent away when you did something different.
But now you have grown out of those old ways of being.
When will you throw off those old shackles, those old promises, those old commitments, those unspoken agreements, those family lineages, and claim your birthright as a woman and a mother?
As the saying goes, if not now, then when?
But now I know that nothing could be further from the truth.
After 15 years of being a mother, and 15 years of working with mothers and mothers-to-be, I know that it is one of the biggest myths still around.
Being a mother isn't about seriousness and sacrifice, its about sacredness and psychospiritual growth.
It's not meant to be boring drudgery, it's actually one of the most powerful ways to grow and transform.
As mothers, we don't need to give up doing what we love.
It's not designed to be a fight between being a mother, doing what we love, and sharing our gifts with the world.
Our lives as mothers can deeply enrich our inner journey, AND the way we share our gifts with the world.
And our passions and contributions in the world can give us MORE to give to our child/ren.
It's time to shatter the old myth, and step into the bigger life that's awaiting.
Our lives can be a rich tapestry of colour and texture ~ being ourselves, being a mother, living our passions, sharing out gifts.
Each part of our lives enriching all the other parts.
I know what it's like to be a busy mother, and I know how full life can be, especially when your child is little, or a baby.
I have so much compassion for you, and for all of us, and all that being a mother requires.
That is why I designed this course - to make our lives more enjoyable, more beautiful, and more fulfilling.
And I kept in mind how busy we are when I made the course.
What if your son was passionate about painting, and wanted to go to painting classes each week?
Loving him as you do, and wanting to support him in his passion, I imagine you'd find a way to make it happen so that he could go to those classes.
What if your daughter completely loved martial arts and was longing to go to classes every week?
I bet you would move heaven and earth to make it happen for her, despite your full lives.
Are you willing to treat yourself the way you treat your child/ren?
If you feel passionately called to love your life as a mother even more than you do now, are you also willing to give yourself the time in your life to focus on this course, to learn, to practice, to shift, to grow?
I imagine you've had the experience before, that when you are really wanting and willing to do something, then time magically opens up and elongates to make doing that possible.
I remember in one of my online courses, one mother didn't think she had time to do the exercises.
But one day she was determined to start them when her baby had a nap.
Even if he only slept for half an hour, she was going to use that time to focus on doing the course.
And to her surprise, he slept for several hours and she did all the exercises.
When we are really willing, the world opens up in mysterious ways to support our cause.
And for 2017, you have two weeks for each module. That means that the 8 week course is run over 16 weeks.
It's so easy to get lost in all the things we need to do as a mother ~ there are just so many practical things for us to do to every day.
But when we lose track of the deeper purpose of parenting, we are like a ship without a compass.
Coming back to meaning in mothering is what I call finding our North Star.
Part of my purpose is reminding mothers to reconnect with their own meaning.
I think that being a mother is one of the most powerful things we can do to create change in the world.
Forget the politicians and the big business leaders; how we are with our children day after day fundamentally shapes the next generation.
When you connect with what your own personal purpose is in parenting, you have your own North Star to guide you.
Your North Star (or Southern Cross) tells you when you are off course, and gives you a light to follow, to guide you back to yourself and what you most value.
Meaning in mothering brings a sparkle to even the most mundane of days. It can turn a pile of washing into a heap of gratitude, and a dull day into a love fest.
I want to help you reconnect to your own divine purpose, so that you can feel deeply connected with yourself, with your life, and with your child/ren.
How about it?
Parenting is so much more than just the style of parenting we practice.
Underlying every choice and every action is a core belief.
Whether you are following a particular paradigm or finding your own way, you'll be basing what you do on a set of beliefs about the world and human beings.
The particular beliefs that affect our parenting are: what motivates us as human beings; why we do things that we do; why we act in ways that are helpful to others, and why we act in ways that are painful for others.
These core beliefs shape our day to day choices.
Even if you love a particular type of parenting, taking time now and again to go back underneath to look at what is going on at these deeper levels brings clarity and understanding which can guide your choices and make them more conscious.
It can be easy to think that we know it all, that we've read every parenting book, that we know where we stand in our parenting.
This course gives you the opportunity to pull back the curtain and see what is going on underneath.
With that knowledge and awareness, you can return to your own values and act from them.
My own life experiences have given me a capacity for deep compassion for every mother.
Experiencing divorce, miscarriage, and the inevitable humility that comes from 15 years of being a mother means that I have love for each mother and her journey.
Compassion is the core of my work.
In my professional life, I have trained in many disciplines and modalities, most of which I bring in to this course.
I have a degree in psychology (I got the only first in my year!), and a PhD on the mother-infant relationship from Cambridge University, England.
I was a post-doctoral research fellow for two years at Exeter University, where I studied the abilities of babies.
I taught MA students the Therapeutic Relationship for two years at the Department of Complementary Health Studies, also at Exeter University.
Meanwhile, I did a six year part time training in Psychosynthesis Psychotherapy at the Institute of Psychosynthesis, London. I was the youngest person ever to have qualified there as a psychotherapist and counsellor.
I have trained in worked in many modalities including HypnoBirthing, Private Subconscious-mind Healing, Calm Birth, Aware Parenting, Nonviolent Communication, and the Field Project.
I was one of the first Aware Parenting Instructors in Australia and the first Field Project Certified Facilitator in Australia, and I am the only level 2 Aware Parenting Instructor in Australia.
I spent my entire twenties in weekly psychotherapy, and have consistently been on my own journey of increasing consciousness and compassion for myself, my children, and others.
I have read a LOT of books on personal development, spirituality, women and the feminine!
I have been working therapeutically with clients for 23 years.
15 of those years have been with parents and parents-to-be (mostly mothers).
In that time I have seen the kinds of issues, feelings and themes that come up time and time again for mothers.
I've combined my own experiences with all my trainings and my work with clients to create a course that it suitable for mothers who are new to self-exploration, as well as for those who have spent many years on their psycho-spiritual development.
The course is designed to work at whatever level you are coming in from, and whatever age your child is (including babies and teenagers!)
I've been passionate about understanding how our early life and our relationship with our mother affects the rest of our life since I was 17 and realised that being in an incubator for my first 5 weeks was having a profound impact on who I was, what I felt and how I acted. I was also separated from my mum for 18 months when I was 9-10 years old.
As a result of these separations, I've spent a lot of time exploring the mother-child relationship, both in my personal and professional lives.
For many years I focussed on helping parents understand their baby and child's feelings and needs.
In more recent years my focus has shifted to mothers - knowing that when we have friendly self-beliefs, when we are heard, when we are lit up inside, we automatically pass on these gifts to our children.
I created the Love Being a Mother Course because, after 25 years focussing on the relationship between mothers and children, I'm passionate about inspiring mothers to reclaim the sacredness of mothering.
My sense of purpose is connected to help changing core beliefs about mothers and mothering.
To help us remember that being a mother is one of the most powerful things we can be and do.
I know that who we are as mothers indelibly shapes our children, and I want for us all to have the life we've longed for.
And I know that the change starts with us.
1 ~ Change Cultural Core Convictions
This first module is all about beliefs and values.
I’ll be taking you through the recent history of psychology, which reflects the changing beliefs about human beings.
You’ll also be looking at your own history and how it impacts on who you are as a mother now.
You’ll be connecting with your own unique Vessel for your Vision and Values. This Vessel is your North Star for the rest of the course. You’ll be connecting with what is really important to you, connecting with your deepest self, and letting that guide your mothering journey.
2 ~ Banish Punishing Yourself
You may avoid punishing your child, but have you ever reflected on how often you punish yourself?
This module teaches about stagnant feelings, such as guilt, shame, and depression, and how they are created by the ways that we think.
You’ll get to see why you feel those stagnant feelings, the gold that lies buried underneath them, and how to use alchemy to transmute them into gold.
3 ~ Love Your Feelings
Learn how to translate your stagnant feelings into moving feelings.
Understand why your moving feelings connect you to your deepest self, and how you can feel deeply connected.
Notice how you naturally desire to contribute and cooperate with your children when you connect with yourself in these ways.
Have your feelings as your friends. Come home to yourself.
4 ~ Love What You Want
When you value your needs and desires, you are valuing YOU.
Our needs and desires are signposts on the maps to our fulfilment.
Change from the belief that meeting your needs last serves our family and community, to knowing that listening to your needs and desires gives you more to give.
Learn to connect with your needs and desires in tangible ways, and understand how you can get these fulfilled.
5 ~ Love Your Child's Feelings
Know why it is so important for our children that we love their feelings, and how it leads to them being deeply connected with they truly are.
Even if you’re listening to your child’s feelings already, this module will help you go from listening to their feelings, to loving them.
Understand the causes of children’s challenging behaviours, and how you can help by doing less and being more.
6 ~ Do What You Love
Doing what we love changes everything as a mother.
Everything got turned around, and we believed that working hard, being “good” and sacrificing what we love, made us a good mother. This module we will turn them back around to their rightful place.
Doing what we love is the biggest gift we can give our children. When we are lit up, on purpose, happy to be alive, and doing what we love, we shine a light of joy and abundance to our children.
Loosen the internal and external blocks to doing what you love. Make doing what you love a practice.
7 ~ Have Fun!
Here’s another thing that’s back to front and upside down. We think that being serious and stopping ourselves from having fun makes us a “good” parent.
But actually, when we let ourselves have fun, we change our whole family.
Learn about how fun and laughter is deeply healing of powerlessness, helplessness and frustration, which are common experiences as a mother and as a child.
Explore and release core beliefs that stop you from accessing your own natural store of fun.
Become a fun mum/mom!
8 ~ Create Celebration and Compassion
One of the most central pieces of this course, which takes us full circle to module 1, is changing our beliefs and ways of being with other mothers.
Judgment of, and separation between, mothers is part of how mothers and mothering have been devalued.
To value and celebrate ourselves as mothers, and other mothers, we need to move past judgment and choose compassion.
This compassion co-creates a new world for us as mothers and our children.
Have a sense of sisterhood that holds you through your day-to-day life.
- 8 X Fortnightly Materials in Video, Audio and Written Format
- 8 X Fortnightly FB Lives
- 8 X Fortnightly Metamorphosis Meditations
- Feminine Facebook Forum
- Love Being a Mother Journal
Fortnightly Course Materials
You’ll have fortnightly learning material, exercises and practices in both written versions (in pdf and Evernote versions) audios, and videos – in which I talk you through the understandings and processes.
Fortnightly FB Lives
FB Lives for you to write questions and receive answers, support, inspiration, and motivation.
And they’ll be available afterwards, if the time doesn’t suit you.
Fortnightly Metamorphosis Meditations
Each fortnight you’ll receive a Metamorphosis Meditation that complements and supports what you are doing on the conscious level by working with the deep inner mind.
Feminine Facebook Forum
Central to this work is the support, inspiration, empathy, compassion, motivation and love of other mothers.
The Facebook Forum is Feminine because it is about buoying each other up, celebrating each other to shine, being empathic and using our collective intentions to create much more than would be possible alone.
Love Being a Mother Journal
So this isn’t just pie in the sky, you’ll receive a PDF journal to print out so that you can record your North Star for the course, each module, and each day.
And before you feel overwhelmed, it’s CONCISE!
Less than 5 minutes to write down your intentions each day and your reflections each evening.
Creating changes based on the material requires us to make them into practices – true change comes from consistency.
Your journal helps you keep connected with yourself and keep track of where you’re going, so you can stay aligned with your North Star.